16 years ago, I met this boy. Well, he wasn’t a boy, he was a man. He was 26 and I was a 19-year-old kid (but not in the “you-can-go-to-jail” sense of the word…I was 19, after all). I was figuring out if college was for me (it wasn’t) and he had a career as a cop. We met at the wedding of two other cops and he has not left my side since. There were only a couple of things that were a little wrong with this romantical story. 1) I had a boyfriend and he was my date at this wedding and 2) this man worked very closely with my father, who was also a cop at the time (as of today, he’s been retired for 3 or 4 years). Now, problem #1 turned out to not really be a problem. The boy and I broke up and we’ve haven’t spoken since. But problem #2? That was a biggun. You do not date your cop-father’s partner. You do not date your partner’s only daughter. And we were breaking those rules. Good thing the whole thing panned out, I guess. I hate to see what would have happened if Corey had broken my heart!
I want to take a second to tell you about this man I met at that wedding. 4 months after we met at said wedding, we were engaged. [He asked my grandfather (also a retired cop) and my father for permission to marry me. Mothers of boys, teach your sons this!] 2 years after that engagement, we were married. 2 years later, we became parents for the first time and 1 year after that, we became parents again. He has seen me through some pretty severe ups and downs, including a life-threatening bout with postpartum depression following the birth of our second son. I’ve said things to him that shouldn’t be said to one’s worst enemy. (In my defense, I’ve grown tremendously.) And he’s never left my side. Never.
Loving someone like me cannot be easy for a myriad of reasons. For one, I am what you would call a “fly by the seat of my pants” kind of girl, which means I change my mind and my attitude a lot. I mean, A LOT. I have mood swings that could kill an ox. Or a yak…whichever is bigger (because my stuff is big, y’all). But Corey has never wavered in his commitment to me. Secondly, (kind of building on the first thing) I have a problem seeing things through. I am a really strong starter and a really weak finisher. This is an area of my life that I am paying particular attention to right now, trying to make the necessary tweaks and adjustments. One last reason it ain’t easy being Corey is that I am stubborn. STUB. BORN. I cannot be shown alternative ways to do things. I can’t be told I’m wrong without putting up a huge fit. And, boy, that can’t be that pleasant to live with sometimes.
But I think I do one thing really, really well, which makes me quite the catch for Corey. When I love someone, I only know how to love one way…FIERCELY. I love with every ounce of my being. I am Corey’s very biggest fan. I think he is one of the most logical men I know, which drives me crazy some days. I support every career move he has ever made, even if I haven’t liked it. I always present a united front with him in front of our sons. I make it known that I think that Corey, my dad, and my papa are (and were) the best cops that ever wore the badge. I cannot be told otherwise (mainly because I’m right). That’s how I roll…FIERCE. Our marriage has seen incredible highs and heartbreaking lows but, by the unending, unexplainable grace of a loving and merciful God, we are doing this thing and we are doing it with more heart and more effort than ever before and we will continue ’til the wheels fall off.
This post seems like it may be a snoozer. I think I wrote it more for myself than anyone reading and, for that, I do apologize. But you should know about the man I love. He makes me the girl who writes.